If by chance you haven’t yet sent a Christmas present my way (a category you all fall into), I have some belated ideas for you – sorted categorically. All are plenty attainable and I would prefer them sooner than later, but as long as they arrive we’ll call it good.
First and foremost, we have Kansas football. These need to be delivered promptly.
- 35+ points
- 400+ yards
- 4 sacks of Adam Weber
- 2 Darrell Stuckey interceptions
- 1 Daymond Patterson TD
- 1 Insight Bowl victory
- And as many pass rushing lineman as you can find
- Sat-Go. It may have the worst name in the history of product marketing, but that deters me not.
- A five figure DJIA
- Megan Fox. No explanation necessary.
- A four figure S&P 500
- And another Christopher Nolan Batman
And finally, Kansas basketball. You may need some assistance with a few of these.
- 15 shots a game for Cole.
- 10+ assists per game from Sherron and Tyshawn
- 1 healthy Mario Little
- 2 hustling Morris twins
- 1 offensively competent Travis Releford
- 1 more three point shooter
- 2 less bad shots from Sherron
- < 37% FG percentage defense
- +10 rebounding margin
- 1 entry pass instructional video
- And a 52nd conference championship
That should just about cover me. But that doesn’t preclude anyone from improvising and adding to this perfectly reasonable list. Thanks in advance.