Blow me....Cyclones

A classy way to start off my always sophisticated entries. I gotta tell you, I am not too worried about ISU. A 2:30 televised game at home and on Senior Day? These kids will come out ready to knock someone's dick in the dirt. B-Mac might singlehandedly decapitate someone out there tomorrow and Brian Seymour will get double-teamed on special teams to effectively provide huge holes for our return game...that's right Seymour BITCH! As my partner in crime described below we shouldn't take anyone too lightly and I agree...to an extent. This Kansas team does an excellent job of coming out and being ready to take care of business, save for our first offensive possessions of the game.

It would take a mighty oversight to let the 'Clones come in and hang around too long. Who am I to look ahead, I am just a simple fan....I fell on some ice and later got thawed out by some of your scientists. Your world frightens and confuses me! Sometimes the honking horns of your traffic make me want to get out of my BMW.. and run off into the hills, or wherever.....Sometimes when I get a message on my fax machine, I wonder: "Did little demons get inside and type it?" I don't know! My primitive mind can't grasp these concepts. But there is one thing I DO know - The Jayhawks will not be overlooking the Cyclones and are entitled to no less than two million in compensatory damages, and two million in punitive damages. Thank you.

If it please and sparkles with our readers, may I move on? Sunshine? Ok, let us move on

Since I have been pretty pitiful about posting my picks for the weeks prior I guess I will do some this week. I have decided that I will base all picks this week on the most badass name on the competing teams roster...this should be interesting, actually probably not

Oklahoma (-8) @ Texas Tech
first up for OU

99

Bumpus, Jonte

6-3

212

DE

FR

Muskogee, Okla. (Muskogee HS)

Sons of bitches! Bumpuses!
not so close 2nd

17

Madu, Mossis

5-11

191

RB

RS FR

Norman, Okla. (Norman HS)

versus

68

Landon Burge

RS SO

6-3/284

Offensive Line

Leander, Texas (Leander)

Elaine: Hey, isn't that Landon Burge?

Jerry: Yep, Landon Burge. He's got a good 'John Houseman' name. Landon Buuurge.
Mr. Buuurge.
not so close 2nd

89

Brik Brinker

RS FR

6-2/180

Wide Receiver

Wolfforth, Texas (Frenship)

seriously?

Winner- Got to go with my man Bumpus on this one. I would love to be in the crowd screaming "Razzafrackin Bumpuses!" after he makes a tackle.
Bumpuses 45 fighting Brik Brinkers 28

Methzouri (-7) @ Kansas State
A hard fought name battle for Mizzou

38

Stryker Sulak

Defensive Lineman

6-5/240

RS JR

Rockdale, Texas (Rockdale)

I honestly picked him just so I could quote this movie.
Ted Striker: It's Lieutenant Hurwitz. Severe shell-shock. Thinks he's Ethel Merman.
Lieutenant Hurwitz: [singing] You'll be swell, you'll be great. Gonna have the whole world on a plate. Startin' here, startin' now. Honey, everything's comin' up roses...
Ted Striker: War is hell.

a tie for close second

14

Scipio Daniels

Safety

6-0/180

FR

Blue Springs, Mo. (Blue Springs)

very ballsy to name a kid Scipio...

30

Drew Yanker

Wide Receiver

5-11/176

FR

Fenton, Mo. (Lindbergh)

i liked the last name...wanna fight about it?

versus

77

Freeze, Colten

OL

6-5

281

Fr.

Liberty, Mo. (Liberty)

Badass!
close 2nd

78

Alesana, Alesana

OL

6-4

299

Jr.

Malie, W. Samoa (San Francisco CC)

So nice they named him twice.

52

Stewart, Xzavier

DT

6-1

304

Fr.

Chicago, Ill. (Morgan Park)

Someone found it necessary to put a Z after the X in Xavier. Hooked on Pohonics! working fo ME!

Winner- Rex Kramer: Striker, listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

Ted Strikers 41 Mr. Freeze 10

Oklahoma St.(-14) @ Baylor

92

Tea Jr., Tonga

DT

6-0

310

Jr.

Anchorage, Alaska (East High School/Snow CC)

Okie State needs only one entry and it might be the most Badass/odd of them all. There is only one Tonga Tea...oh wait, besides his dad...make that only one Tonga Tea Jr..

versus

50

Sam Shalala

LB

6-1

220

JR-SQ

Sugar Land, Texas/Kempner

Baylor sucks and so do their names, no wonder they suck at football. This is the best they have. Maybe he should have played for Miami.

Winner- Isn't this obvious by now?
The Tonga Tea Travelling Touchdown Tornados 48 The Sucky Shalalas 17

Kansas (-26) vs. Iowa State
You have got to love some of the KU names....

3

Aqib Talib

CB

6-2

205

Jr.-RS

Richardson, Texas (Berkner HS)

12

James Holt

LB

6-3

220

Jr.

Altus, Okla. (Altus HS)

22

Angus Quigley

RB

6-2

220

So.-RS

Cleburne, Texas (Cleburne HS)

18

Xavier Rambo

WR

6-0

195

Fr.-RS

Dallas, Texas (South Oak Cliff HS)

36

Tang Bacheyie

RB

6-1

210

Jr.

Windsor, Ontario (Sandwich HS)

67

Rameses Arceo

OL

6-4

300

Jr.-TR

Whittier, Calif. (St. Paul HS/Cerritos College)

89

Tertavian Ingram

WR

6-0

190

Fr.-RS

Tampa, Fla. (Jefferson HS)

That is all-star quality nameage...

versus

9

Messiah, Euseph

WR

5-10

171

Jr.

Bettendorf, Iowa (Bettendorf)

Got to admit that is pretty Badass

Winner- I guess we will say Xavier Rambo is the most badass, even if Aqib("Last to come") works pretty well with the ladies. ISU is no match for the most Badass Name Team in the nation.

John Rambo's House of Pain 56 The Messiah 10

One last home game homies...enjoy it and please don't crank dat soulja boy!
Don't be a Dick